It is Christmas today, and we all are celebrating the season. Here at Wolexis, we decided to steer Santa from the North Pole to Emirates Sta...
It is Christmas today, and we all are celebrating the season.
Here at Wolexis, we decided to steer Santa from the North Pole to Emirates Stadium today regardless if the Gunners have been good or bad this year.
We decided to be Santa’s elves and package the right gifts for the boys at Emirates, traditionally gifts are opened on Boxing Day but you get a sneak peek.
CANNON BALLS.
Of what use would a Gunner be if he had no cannon balls for his antique cannon? Arsenal’s war has been changing over the course of the season, from winning the title, to challenging for it, and now to qualifying for Europe.
It has been sketchy for them since and look to run out of ammo most of the times. The Gunners are four points behind in continental places and fifteen away from being top of the table, Arsenal need more than cannon balls to pose a challenge this season, to be honest, they might just need balls- if you know what I mean.
BIBLE FOR SANCHEZ
It has not been easy for the Chilean, and I’m wondering if he has to take a whole lot of Tylenol for his contributions to holding Arsenal high on the table.
Without his goals, the Gunners would be hovering close to relegation places, such is the over-reliance on him that Arsene Wenger fears he could get a burnout and labeled the striker being in the red zone.
Unfortunately, unlike Shegz Okoro of Supa Strikaz, the red zone is not a marvelous streak of unfathomable brilliance but a zone of possible hamstring, ruptures, and tearings. So what is the bible for? Easy- using our highlighter on the bible. Matthew 11:28-30.
MORE WC’S
Not water closests- would be really odd for someone to wish that for Christmas, but World Class players. Not one, two, but perhaps three, spread out across the attack, midfield, and defence.
Not the easiest of packages to deliver to North London but Santa had this top of his list for Arsenal this Christmas, we would have thrown in a goalie but the exchange rate has been really horrible for us at the North Pole affected by the oil prices as well, anyways, a Cavani-Reus-Hummels transfer does not look bad, does it? Takes a lot of guts to open this box, but we have sent it anyway.
INVISIBILITY CLOAK
This we are sending to Arsenal whole-heartedly, we were able to get it off the Hogwarts’ auction and we have decided to enlarge it so it could cover the whole matchday playing and non-playing staff against big teams in this second half of the season. Believe me, against the wizardry of big teams, Arsenal have been nothing but muggles.
No, No, No, don’t get it wrong.
Arsenal could have been invincible at one point, now they are vincible and require extreme invisibility at the moment. It is going to be a tough next half against the men, and hiding from a fight to fight another day might not be a bad option.
Merry Christmas!
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